All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Randomize
