He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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