And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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