Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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