i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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