Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
