i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
