i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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