yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize