i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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