He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
