I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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