have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
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I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
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ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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