the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
