I just made out with a guy for $7.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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