There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
