i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
