no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
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