I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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