I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
