so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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