return my video game
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
