Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Randomize