Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
