kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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