i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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