VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize
