you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
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I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
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The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
And then my night got REAL pukey
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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