I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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