Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Princesses don't give blow jobs
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
