the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
