dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
