So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize