We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Randomize