i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
