If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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