I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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