I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
this just has baby written all over it
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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