How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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