If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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