Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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