He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
