Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Never underestimate the power of titties
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