Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
When did angry sex become our thing?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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