well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Randomize
