He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
