id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize
