he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
