i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
