STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
