ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
