Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
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